Monday, January 17, 2005

Tips for Women!


Ways to Turn Down Men.

Man: Haven't I seen you some place before?
Woman: Yes. That's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.

Man: Can I buy you a drink?
Woman: Actually I'd rather have the money.

Man: How did you get to be so beautiful?
Woman: I must have been given your share.

Man: Your face must turn a few heads.
Woman: And your face must turn a few stomachs.

Man: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out.
Woman: Okay, get out.

Man: I think I could make you very happy.
Woman: Why? Are you leaving?

Man: What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
Woman: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.

Man: Can I have your name?
Woman: Why? Don't you already have one?

Man: Shall we go see a movie?
Woman: I've already seen one.

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.


***

Men never learn!?

Due to inherit a fortune when his sickly,
widower father dies, a Man decided he needed a woman
to enjoy it with.
Going to a singles' bar, he spotted a woman
whose beauty took his breath away.
"I'm just an ordinary man," he said, walking up to her,
"but in just a week or two, my father will die
and I'll inherit
20 million dollars."

The woman went home with him, and the next day
she became
his stepmother!

Will Men ever learn.....?

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