Monday, January 17, 2005

FUN on MEN + WOMEN!


"HE Said / SHE Said"!

He said . . . I don't know why you wear a bra;
you've got nothing to put in it.
She said . . .You wear pants don't you?

He said . . . Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said . . .That's a good idea - you stand by the
ironing board while I sit on the sofa.

He said . . . What have you been doing with all the
grocery money I gave you?
She said . . .Turn sideways and look in the mirror!

Written on a wall in a ladies room . . ."My husband
follows me everywhere"
Written just below it . . ."I do not!"

Q . . . How many honest, intelligent, caring men
in the world does it take to do the dishes?
A . . . Both of them.

Q . . . How does a man show that he is planning
for the future?
A . . . He buys two cases of Beer!!!

Q . . . What is the difference between men and
government bonds?
A . . . The bonds mature.

Q . . . Why are blonde jokes so short?
A . . . So men can remember them.

Q . . . How many men does it take to change a roll
of toilet paper?
A . . . We don't know; it has never happened.

Q . . . Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive,
caring and good-looking?
A . . . They already have boyfriends.

Q . . . What do you call a woman who knows where her
husband is every night?
A . . . A widow.

Q . . . Why are married women heavier than single women?
A . . . Single women come home, see what's in the fridge
and go to bed.
Married women come home, see what's in bed and
go to the fridge.

Q . . . What is the one thing that all men at singles bars
have in common?
A . . . They're married.

***

Man says to God:
"God, why did you make woman so beautiful?"
God says:
"So you would love her."
"But God,"
the man says,
"why did you make her so dumb?"
God says:
"So she would love you."

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