Wonderful Definitions!

Wonderful Definitions *** School A place where Parents pay and children play  Life Insurance A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich.  Nurse: A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.  Marriage It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor  degree and a woman gains her masters..  Divorce Future tense of Marriage. Tears The hydraulic force by which masculine  willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.  Lecture An art of transferring information from the notes  of the Lecturer to the notes of the students  without passing through "the minds of either"  Conference The confusion of one man multiplied by  the number present.  Compromise The art of dividing a cake in such a way that  everybody believes he got the biggest piece  Dictionary A place where success comes before work  Conference Room A place where everybody talks, nobody  listens and everybody disagrees later on  Father A banker provided by nature  Criminal A person no different from the rest ....except that he/she got caught  Boss Someone who is early when you are late  and late when you are early Politician One who shakes your hand before elections  and your Confidence after  DOCTOR A person who holds your ills by pills,  and kills you by bills.  Classic Books, which people praise,  but do not read.  Smile A curve that can set a lot of things straight.  Office A place where you can relax after your  strenuous home life.  Yawn The only time some married men ever get  to open their mouth.  Etc. A sign to make others believe that you know  more than you actually do.  Committee Individuals who can do nothing individually  and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.  Experience The name men give to their mistakes.  Atom Bomb An invention to end all inventions.  Philosopher A fool who torments himself during life, to be wise ***  BE HAPPY!!!