House Plans
Sunday, July 30, 2006
Monday, July 24, 2006
TODAY!!!
21 st Century...
Our communication - Wireless
Our dress - Topless
Our telephone - Cordless
Our cooking - Fireless
Our youth - Jobless
Our food - Fatless
Our labour - Effortless
Our conduct - Worthless
Our relation - Loveless
Our attitude - Careless
Our feelings - Heartless
Our politics - Shameless
Our education - Valueless
Our follies - Countless
Our arguments - Baseless
Our boss - Brainless
Our Job - Thankless*
Our Salary - Very less*
Our communication - Wireless
Our dress - Topless
Our telephone - Cordless
Our cooking - Fireless
Our youth - Jobless
Our food - Fatless
Our labour - Effortless
Our conduct - Worthless
Our relation - Loveless
Our attitude - Careless
Our feelings - Heartless
Our politics - Shameless
Our education - Valueless
Our follies - Countless
Our arguments - Baseless
Our boss - Brainless
Our Job - Thankless*
Our Salary - Very less*
Monday, July 17, 2006
Sunday, July 16, 2006
MAN + WOMAN!
ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
Smart man+smart woman = romance
Smart man+dumb woman = affair
Dumb man+smart woman = marriage
Dumb man+dumb woman = pregnancy
OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss+smart employee = profit
Smart boss+dumb employee = production
Dumb boss+smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss+dumb employee = overtime
SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.
GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men do,
but married men are a lot more willing to die.
PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings,
poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me,
"You're next."
They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
Smart man+smart woman = romance
Smart man+dumb woman = affair
Dumb man+smart woman = marriage
Dumb man+dumb woman = pregnancy
OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss+smart employee = profit
Smart boss+dumb employee = production
Dumb boss+smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss+dumb employee = overtime
SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.
GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men do,
but married men are a lot more willing to die.
PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings,
poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me,
"You're next."
They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
Tuesday, July 04, 2006
Chinese Proverbs
** Virginity like bubble; one prick, all gone.
** Foolish man give wife grand piano,
wise man give wife upright organ.
** Man with hand in pocket, a cocky man.
** Man who runs in front of car gets tired,
man who runs behind car get exhausted.
** Man with one chopstick go hungry.
** Man who scratches ass should not bite fingernails.
** Panties not best thing on earth
but next to best thing on earth.
** Man who fight with wife all day
gets no piece at night.
** It takes many nails to build crib;
but one screw to fill it.
** Man who drives like hell bound to get there.
** Man who lives in glass house
should not have enemies.
** Man who lives in glass house
should change clothes in basement.
** Honeymoon should only last six days;
because seven days makes 'hole weak' (whole week).
** Foolish man give wife grand piano,
wise man give wife upright organ.
** Man with hand in pocket, a cocky man.
** Man who runs in front of car gets tired,
man who runs behind car get exhausted.
** Man with one chopstick go hungry.
** Man who scratches ass should not bite fingernails.
** Panties not best thing on earth
but next to best thing on earth.
** Man who fight with wife all day
gets no piece at night.
** It takes many nails to build crib;
but one screw to fill it.
** Man who drives like hell bound to get there.
** Man who lives in glass house
should not have enemies.
** Man who lives in glass house
should change clothes in basement.
** Honeymoon should only last six days;
because seven days makes 'hole weak' (whole week).
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