Stress Relievers Jokes!

Stress Reliever .. 1
Wife : You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office.
Why ?
Hubby : When there is a problem, no matter how impossible,
I look at your picture and the problem disappears.
Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Hubby: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself,
"What other problem can there be greater than this one?"

Stress Reliever ... 2
Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries,
troubles and lighten your burden.
Boy: It's very kind of you, darling, But I don't have any worries
or troubles.
Girl: Well that's because we aren't married yet.

Stress Reliever .. 3
Son: Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning,
he told me to give up my seat to a lady.
Mom: Well, you have done the right thing.
Son: But mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap.

Stress Reliever ... 4
Wife to husband: " What's your excuse for coming home at this
time of the night?"
Husband to wife: " Golfing with friends, my dear."
Wife to husband: " What ? At 2 am ? "
Husband to wife: " Yes, We used night clubs."

Stress Reliever ... 5
A newly married man asked his wife, "Would you have married me
if my father hadn't left me a fortune?"
"Honey," the woman replied sweetly, "I'd have married you NO
MATTER WHO LEFT YOU A FORTUNE"

Stress Reliever ... 6
Father to son after exam: " Let me see your report card."
Son: "My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents."

Stress Reliever ... 7
" How was your blind date ? " a college student asked her roommate.
" Terrible ! " the roommate answered. " He showed up in his 1932
Rolls Royce."
"Wow! That's a very expensive car. What's so bad about that ? "
"He was the original owner."

Stress Reliever .. 8
A teacher asked her class for sentences using the word "beans"..
"My father grows beans," said one student.
"My father cooks beans," said another.
Then little Johnny spoke up: "We are all human beans."

Stress Reliever .. 9
Interviewer to Millionaire: "To whom do you owe your success as a
millionaire?"
Millionaire: "I owe everything to my wife."
Interviewer: "Wow, she must be some woman. What were you
before you married her ?"
Millionaire: "A Billionaire"

Stress Reliever ... 10
Girl to her boyfriend: One kiss and I'll be yours forever.
The guy replies: Thanks for the warning.

Stress Reliever ... 11
A husband was asked: "Do you talk to your wife after sex?"
He replied: "Depends, if I can find a phone."

Stress Reliever ... 12
Man to wife on wedding night: "Are you sure I'm the first man you
are sleeping with?"
Wife replied: "Of course honey, I stayed awake with all the others!"

Stress Reliever .. 13
"Why did they stop printing PAMELA ANDERSON stamps in the U.S.?"
Answer: "Because people started licking the wrong side."

Stress Reliever .. 14
A wife asked her husband: "What do you like most in me - my
pretty face or my sexy body?"
He looked at her from head to toe and replied: "I like your sense of humour."